Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Is this thing still on?

I'm coming out of my cave. No, that's nothing like coming out of the closet.


A former colleague once observed that when an outside force causes a major shift in my best laid plans, I sit in a metaphorical corner for a few days and lick my wounds. This time the corner was a cave. And the days turned into weeks. And the wounds were too deep to lick.

I lost my job.

This may not seem significant enough to warrant such a dramatic response, but I quickly learned that losing what's been a large part of my life (and a constant amongst all the life changes), as well as part of my identity, for the past few years needed to be grieved before I could move forward. I hid in my antisocial cave and went through all the stages - denial, anger, bargaining, and depression - and am finally emerging with acceptance, a plan of action, and a desire to reconnect with the outside world.

My one little word "try" means more to me now than when I picked it earlier this year as I try to accept what I cannot change, try to make the best of the situation, and try to remember all I have to be grateful for in my life. Oh yeah, and try to get a new job. ☺

8 comments:

Jenny said...

Everything happens for a reason and this, too, will lead you down your path of happiness. ;) You're going to be great! I'm glad you're back with us!

Kristin said...

Hi Cheryl! I'm so sorry you lost your job. Good luck finding a new one :-)

Kelly Miller said...

I'm so sorry! Yeesh, what a new year.

You probably don't want to hear this, but I lost my job when I was 7 months pregnant ... and it was the best thing that could've happened. It took a while to get to the good part, but it was so worth. My suggestion is to look for your window. It has to be there.

Cheri said...

Losing a job really sucks big time, so I can understand the need for mourning. Now that you are beyond that stage, I hope your silver lining comes quickly! Best of luck in your job hunt.

Anonymous said...

you rock it girl! you are a strong, incredibly talented and a wonderful woman-not to mention a pretty rad friend. You're never given what you cannot handle-this is just a bump in the road that will make you reflect and grow into that super woman you are :) share it with the world and keep on truckin my love!

ps-ice cream with rainbow sprinkles along the way is also extremely helpful :)

xoxo
sara

Yvette said...

Cheryl!!!! I've been misssssing you!! I've thought about you often!!! I'm so happy you are back with us!!

I'm sorry to hear of your job loss, but I'm thinking it's "their" loss and your gain! Even though I don't know you very well I think you have amazing talents, skill and education! Which ever road you decide to take I believe you WILL BE an asset wherever you go. You just KEEP your chin UP and march forward! Don't look behind! Take the bull by the horns girl and be the woman I believe you are!!!

Again, so glad your back!!! I love reading your post!! You soooo make me laugh!!! :D

Hugs,
Yvette

sojinkeys said...

So sorry to hear about the job, my friend. I know how you feel (I was laid off in Aug) and am here for you if you need to vent! Hugs!

April said...

I am sorry life has thrown you a doozy. I am glad to hear that you're ready to come out of your cave.

I'm a cave dweller too when I am having a hard time...